Thursday, January 29, 2015

Here kiddie kiddie

This picture is just so damn funny.  There has to be thousands of (in)appropriate captions for it.

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Jesse Ventura: Professional Asshat Extrordinaire

So, apparently being a bitch and suing the widow of a REAL American hero qualifies one to cast aspersions on others.  Jesse "Widow Slayer" Ventura has, of course, weighed in with his two cents worth on the "American Sniper" broo ha ha.  Without missing a beat, the current reigning heavyweight ass clown of the world has declared that Chris Kyle was no hero, and that one cannot be a liar and a hero too.


So, I suppose that makes Bradley "Babs" Manning a hero in Mr. Ventura's esteemed opinion.  I dunno.   I'm thinking that Chris Kyle was pretty much the real deal, while Jesse was busy playing 'make-believe'.

Of Course, one had a movie made about him because he was such a bad ass, while the other had to pretend to be a bad ass in a movie about croaking an alien (which, of course Jesse also got his ass kicked in).

Why won't this fucker just fade away?

Monday, January 26, 2015

American Bad Ass

Kid Rock is just making me smile a lot this week. First it was the mountain lion thing, and now he's killing whales too. I love this blast of Mikey Moore and Seth Rogan. I copied this straight from his page at

Fuck you Michael Moore, you’re a piece of shit and your uncle would be ashamed of you. Seth Rogen, your uncle probably molested you. I hope both of you catch a fist to the face soon.

God bless you Chris Kyle, Thank you for your service.

Keep up the good work, Kid.

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

From the Penthouse to the Bighouse

Well, it looks like one dirty cop/ judge is finally getting his just desserts. Tommy Rosella, formerly of Rio Arriba County (New Mexico), will be changing his address for the next ten years after basically being a complete and total douchenozzle, while shoving his badge in peoples' faces, threatening them with his service weapon, and performing favors for friends and supporters in his official roles as both Sheriff and Magistrate Judge.

Tommy was convicted for violating civilians civil rights, meaning he will be serving his sentence in the relaxing atmosphere of a Federal Correctional Institute.  I'm sure he will be setting up a gofundme account to help him out with commissary purchases.

Have a great time Tommy, and...

Don't drop the soap.

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Kid Rock Causes Liberal Tears

Ted Nugent posted a picture the other day on his FB page, showing Kid Rock posing with a mountain lion that he had shot and killed.  Of course, the comments section for that photo blew smooth the fuck up, with all kinds of liberal bed wetters crying about the poor, defenseless kitty and all that other shit.

First, I can only imagine why any liberal candy ass would follow Uncle Ted''s page.  It wouldn't have anything to do with waiting for something, anything, to snivel about, would it?

Second, I am insanely jealous.  I have been hunting in the western United States my entire life, and I've never gotten a shot at a cat.  I will get my chance someday.

Anyhow, here's the pic and the link.  Bon appetite, amigos y amigas!

Monday, January 19, 2015

On What Fucking Planet?

Blomberg reports that pResident Jugears has a 50% approval rating heading into the SOTU address. This flies in the face of everything I have read on other sites, and definitely does not jive with the many, many conversations I have daily.  So, I just want to know what fucking planet are they polling?

Sunday, January 18, 2015

Snipers are not Whalers, Mikey!

Apparently Shamu has issues with people that can kill you from a mile away with a rifle.

Friday, January 16, 2015

Fuck, I thought this was the Buzz Lightyear version

Schoolhouse VOX

You know, I just cant quit thinking about that stoooopid fucker from Vox and the article about how the Senate is tilted in favor of small states and that it needs to be abolished and fuck me runnin how damn ignorant can one fucking human be?  Anyhow, Old Beanburner here was overjoyed this morning to hear about this...

Yup, finally a bit of common sense prevailing.  Arizona has passed a law (with North Dakota expected to follow suit very shortly), requiring high school students to be able to pass a Civics test prior to graduation.

I'm thinking that perhaps Vox should relocate to Arizona, and send their stupid assed writers to some remedial training in Civics, so they may possibly understand WHY the Senate and House memberships are made up the way they are.

If that fails, maybe we could just get some re-runs of Schoolhouse Rock and loop it on their Ipods.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Big Boys Toys

My father in law got a 91 Dodge 4x4 diesel when it was a year old.  He and I traveled all over Texas and New Mexico in that truck, mostly pulling a bass boat headed to or from some tournament.  Now, that man was my best friend for over 20 years (until fucking alzheimers stole him from me), but he couldn't drive for shit.  So, it was usually my ass sitting in the drivers seat.  He's in a home now, and he doesn't have any idea who I am and can't remember the hundreds and hundreds of incredible times we had, but I still have that truck.  It still has the original paint on it, so it kinda looks like a dalmation, but that's being remedied Johnny Cash Style ( one piece at a time and black).  So far I have the roof, the hood, and both doors done, with plans to tackle the front fenders this weekend.  I'll bet that truck has at least 300k miles, and I plan on getting at least that many more out of it.  All three of my boys grew up riding in that truck, and hopefully It'll still be around for me to pass down. Anyhow, the picture below is one that looks damn near exactly like my truck, and if I ever git er done, I'll post some pics to amaze and inspire you all.  Say a prayer tonight for my father in law and anybody else suffering from that shitty, fucked up disease, and while your at it, throw up a thanks for memories you can hold on to.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Back in Business Again!

I know I've probably not hit very many MIA lists, but I am back, for those of you that missed me.  I was just about as busy as a one legged cat covering two piles of shit.

I have no idea what possessed me to do so, but I actually ran for Sheriff.  I got my ass whupped, but I guess its an experience I can cross off the bucket list, or whatever.  I live in a small town in a small county, and I've only been here for 7 years, so I still have that "outsider" label.  Took 30 percent of the vote, so I guess that aint too bad.

Somewhere in the process of losing the election, I tore my miniscus, so I have now had my third scope.  It's a good thing I like my doc.  We spend a lot of quality time together.

Anyhow, I know I'm late to the party on this one, but I have a very special "FUCK YOU" to the people at Vox.  You stupid sunsabitches need to take a fucking civics class and figure out WHY the House and Senate are set up the way they are before you open your cock traps complaining about it.  No, seriously,...FUCK YOU, from a small state resident that is very happy that states like Kommiefornia and New York don't rule every inch of this country.



PS.  Fuck you too Barry