Monday, December 23, 2013

Anti's, Phobias and other assorted doublespeak

     I realize that I aint the first person to recognize this for what it is, but the latest kerfluffle over Phil Robertson's comments bring to light, once again, the liberal tactic of casting a negative light on everything they do not agree with.  For instance, if you support the Second Amendment, you are a gun nut.  If you don't agree with murdering unborn children, you are Anti-Choice (or a General in the War on Women).  If you believe in Jesus Christ as your personal savior, you are a religious fanatic.  In the case of the Duck Commander, he is now a homophobe.

     I was naively unaware that disagreeing with a certain topic, or in this case, lifestyle, qualified a person as having a fear of said topic, or lifestyle.  Even living in the great outback of New Mexico, I have been exposed to several people that are openly homosexual, and count many of them among my friends.  I have no problem being around them, and actually find them to be some of the funniest fuckers I've ever been around.  However, I try not to let my mind wander off into the one thing that makes us different, as I, like Phil, find a vagina much more attractive than a hairy man ass.  The truly odd part is that I never knew that I feared them, until I was enlightened by the liberal ass hats that would gladly stick that label on me.  Seriously, if you want to see an irrational fear of something, throw a fucking snake in my lap when I aint looking.  That is a phobia.

     No, I don't think I have any diagnosable phobias.  What I do have is a grasp on reality.  A reality that says I can make friends with whomever I please.  A reality that says I don't have to agree with everyone else's world view.  A reality that says I have a responsibility to take care of me and mine first.  A reality that says I have committed no crimes, and therefore should not be treated as a criminal.  A reality that says, short of inciting violence or harm to another, I am free to think and say whatever I want.

     With that being said, Merry Christmas to all of you.  The era of political correctness is gone.  Stand up and be counted!

Friday, December 20, 2013

Monday, December 16, 2013

My sincerest apologies

I know that I have been remiss in posting daily, like I'm supposed to do if I expect people to actually read my stuff.  However, I have, up until recently, had a good reason.  You see, Old Beanburner here is quite a busy man.  I have a regular job that I keep to help pay a few bills, but mostly so I have insurance (for now, anyhow), and I am also a small business owner.  My wife and I own a business, that she primarily handles, but that also requires a great deal of my attention (it's a coffee shop, and if ya didn't already know, I really am a bean burner.  I do all of the roasting for our little shop that Barry did not fucking build).  That, in and of itself, does not excuse me from posting, so I had to add just one more tiny iron to the fire.  I am also an assistant football coach for the high school here in my town, and we just finished a 12 and 1 season, winning the first ever state championship title here.

I'm really not making excuses.  I just wanted to brag a little.

Fuck you Barry.

That is all.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Tell me again why I fucking care...


     I have noticed what seems to be a slight upswing in articles on yahoo that portray dEar leader in somewhat of a negative light.  In all actuality, any article like this is an upswing, because yahoo sucks Barry's nutsack as much as any other MSM, but I digress.  Now, I have to admit that I take certain perverse pleasure in reading the comments below the stories, because some of them are absolutely hilarious (both intentional and not).  Rarely, however, do I post comments there, because I don't feel the need to fuel those fires any further.  I have recently dropped a couple of comments against my better judgment, and it seems like I always get the same response from the lib crowd.

"Your guy did it first".

     I guess this response must be in some fucking liberal handbook somewhere, because that shit gets dropped more than any other line I've seen.  Regardless of what the issue is, some dumbshit out there almost always will come up with a comparison to George Bush (or occassionally Ronald Reagan), to justify in their shit encrusted brain why it is ok for it to be happening now...again....magnified.

     Let me clue you in, Sparky.  I do not give a rat's ass who did it first, or when, or why.  If it is wrong, it is wrong.  If somebody steals my car, it doesn't give me automatic license to go steal somebody else's.  That line of "logic" is exactly why nothing is getting fixed in Washington.  Stop using the past to make excuses for the present, and the future.

     By the way, that "your guy did it first" argument actually makes valid the argument of a lot of patriots, but you really aren't hearing what they are's the government that is corrupt.

All of them.


Friday, November 22, 2013

Thank God. I have proof I'm not a racist.

Perusing through the webs this morning, and I found this gem over on Conservative Blogs Central...

Yet another blowhard, know-it-all dipshit from liberal acadamia, has compiled a list of tell-tale signs that you might be a racist.  Kinda like a Jeff Foxworthy routine, but of course the imbecile is serious.  Anyhow, I'm going through the list, which includes little nuggets of wisdom like you are a racist if you don't like rap music.  Personally, I can't stand that shit, but didn't know that made me a racist.  After hitting one after another of the signs with a check mark, I get to the last one, that says if you eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches you might be a racist.

Friends, that one had me down in the dumps for a moment.  Beanburner is a peanut butter afficianado.  There are few things in this world that are better than peanut butter and jelly, and that's a fact.  Seriously, I saw that and just knew that I had been living in denial for my entire life.  Then it his me.  I'm from New Fucking Mexico.  We don't eat bread here....we eat tortillas.  Peanut butter and jelly on a flour tortilla.  Sonuvabitch, that makes me half Mexican, Spanish-American, Latino.

You have no idea how releived I am right now.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

With a Government like this, who needs terrorists?

And the hits just keep on a' rolling for Team Jugears.  Now, it looks like those of us lucky enough to have group insurance plans are only getting by for a few more months before its our turn to get Barrycare rammed up our anal nether-regions.  Take an eyeball at this shit....

"An analysis by the American Enterprise Institute, a conservative think tank, shows the administration anticipates half to two-thirds of small businesses would have policies canceled or be compelled to send workers onto the ObamaCare exchanges. They predict up to 100 million small and large business policies could be canceled next year. "

A hundred million??? How fucking many zero's is that?

By now, it has become painfully obvious to anyone that has a brain that this shitpile stinks to high heaven, and it has got to go.  I read an article that said 97% of Americans want either an overhaul of Obamacare, or to have it completely abolished.  I guess the other 3% have already received waivers from Emperor Barry and it doesn't matter to them.

Just for shits and grins, a hundred million has eight zero's.


Let's put this into perspective, shall we?  The combined 2012 populations of New York (the state), California, and Texas is 83.42 million.  Still got about 20 million more to go.  How many people live in your state?

I would like to take this opportunity to personally thank the stupid fuckers in DC that voted for this shit.  Harry, Nancy, O'bumble....Thanks.  Thanks a million.

No, thanks a hundred million.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Like a Snowball Headed for Hell

     So apparently dEar leader, His Royal Highness and Supreme Chancellor of all things false and scandalous, Emporer Barry, somehow managed to recite the Gettysburg address (with an assist from the Royal Teleprompter, of course), omitting a slightly vital piece from one line.  That would be a mention of "God".  This, my friends, is EXACTLY where this once great nation went wrong.  Taking God out of the United States is like trying to bake a cake without eggs, milk, water, flour, cake mix, a heat source, and oxygen.  There is only one reason to remove God from this nation, and that is to appease the desire to have no responsibility to anyone other than self.  If there is no higher authority, no reward other than what is attained on planet earth, there is no reason to refrain from gratifying each and every desire that comes into the brain.  Here, we have yet one more example in an ever growing list to show where our pResident is making sure to do his part to exterminate and eliminate the very foundation of The United States of America.

     With each and every step that we take to remove God from our country, the speed at which we are heading toward the demise we dread is increased.  It is, exactly as Merle Hagard said...Rolling downhill like a snowball headed for Hell.

     Knowing that this post will firmly entrench me as a treasonous terror suspect in the minds of my NSA stalker and his/her superiors, all the way up to and including the big eared shitpile in charge, I'll be the first to took a lot to open my eyes too. 

     One more thing.  Because God's forgiveness is free and his grace is abundant, I gotta get this off my chest...


Friday, November 15, 2013

Just to be perfectly clear...

     So, Emporer Barry faced the world yesterday and admitted that the gubburmint had "fumbled" the health care roll out.   I'm just an ordinary guy, but I think I know a fumble when I see one, and this aint it.  As a die hard Dallas Cowboys fan, I can tell you that a "fumble" looks something like this...

Nosir, the fucktastic fiasco known as Obamacare is not a fumble.  The warnings went far beyond simple signs.  There were flat out discussions and proof given to the naked emporer that the clothes he was wearing were more than just a little sheer.  He knew that he was lying.  He knew that people would lose their plans.  He knew that people would lose their doctors.  He knew that the cost of existing plans would skyrocket.  He knew that the website wasn't ready.  He knew all of these things well in advance, and proceeded anyway.  Barry didn't "fumble".

Barry threw the game on purpose.

Monday, November 11, 2013

Yet another Veterans Day Salute!

Words cannot express the amount of gratitude I have for those who have been a part of the American Military.  I am fully aware of the many freedoms that I am blessed with because of their sacrifices.  With that being said, most of my buddies are Marines, so I would be remiss if I did not wish you all a Happy Birthday.  Here's a pic for you fuckers with much love!

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

I'll take my kool-aid with a splash of Cuervo, please.

     So, I was just reading the expose on NBC Investigates about how Barry Jugears already knew millions of us poor fuckers were going to lose our insurance even before he uttered that now famous pinnochio bullshit line about how we could keep our insurance if we liked it.  Of course, those of us that regularly read are not surprised that Barackky O'Dumbass lied.  What gets me is the first comment I ran across at the bottom was some stupid fucking free cell phone grabber claiming that the ACA was some watered down shit that was passed to appease the GOP.

I guess the point of this rant is; Exactly how much kool aid do you have to drink, and what in the fuck is it spiked with in order for you to say something so completely assinine?  I keep trying to count all the R's that voted for that piece of shit "law", and I keep coming up with ZERO.  Liberal scumsucking own this shit top to bottom.  I can only pray that it bites every single one of you in the ass moreso than the people that tried to educate your dumb asses about it beforehand.

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Damn, looks like I just signed up for another group.

Funny how just about everything I've ever thought was right with this country is now being labeled as wrong.  I feel like I just fell through a hole in a tree trunk and I'm drinking Earl Grey through a straw with a cat or some goofy shit. 

What I really need to know is if I owe membership dues to all these fucking groups I belong to now.

PS...Fuck you Barry

Friday, October 11, 2013

Saw this on the news today from the Great By God State of Texas.  I love it.


Monday, August 12, 2013

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Excuse me, is that a metadata in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

   So, the NSA is only gathering 'metadata', huh?  I know you are all already informed about the xkeyscore program by now.  You know, that little program they have that lets them sneaky assed pervs at the NSA to actually read your emails and chats, requiring no authorization above or beyond the ability to type a keyword in a dropdown search bar.  Of course, the gubburmint has stated, repeatedly, that they aint reading anything, just gathering a lot of metadata (a phrase that means jack shit to most people, hence the clueless, careless attitude about it).  Well, please allow the Beanburner to introduce you to Michele Catalano.

A few google searches, and BAM...a knock on the door from Andy and Barney.

This planet is spinnin way too fast anymore.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

The big bad wolf and the skinny assed bears.

   So, as I was perusing my favorite news soiurce for all things non-newsworthy (yahoo), I found this little tidbit about wolves making the bears fat in Yellowstone.  First, I thought about some wolf in the forest, cooking Papa Bear some biscuits and gravy, and pork chops and all that other good stuff.  Then, I figured some goober at yahoo had screwed up the headline yet again, so I proceeded to investigate.

   As it turns out, there is a logical flow for the reasoning behind wolves making bears fat.  Stick with this, cuz its really pretty cool.  First off, we start with elk.  Now I know that elk weren't mentioned in the headline, but "bear" with me.  When wolves were taken out of Yellowstone back in the 20's, the elk population lost a primary predator.  Erego, said Elk population exploded like a hellfire on a jihadi.  Now, the elk gotta eat, and they like them some berrys and shrubs and things all good vegans eat.  This just happens to be the same produce that the bears utilize to store fat up for winter.  Now you follow?  Lots of elk=no berries=skinny bears.

   Fast forward to 1996, and the reintroduction of the wolf into Yellowstone.  The pack grows, and they do what wolves normally do and thin out the elk herd a bit.  Less elk means more berries, and more berries means fatter bears.  In addition, other things that the elk normally have been stuffing themselves on are coming back in abundance, and Yellowstone seems to be thriving.

Imagine that; God's ecosystem working better than the man made one.  Whoda thunk it?

   Now, I know that humans are on this planet, and there has to be some intervention by man to make our place on this big rock, so if a wolf is attacking a herd of cattle, he/she/it should be introduced to the business end of a 7mm pronto.  I also understand that a lot of the reason the planet is as jacked up as it is is because the econo-weenies take shit way too far.  Time to start looking for that balance.

PS.  I stole this from Angel, I think, but it fits my story so there.

Monday, July 29, 2013

Bam, just like that, the weekend's over!

Man my weekend flew by.  I got a lot done, and a lot more to take care of in the next day or two.  I know you guys don't know this yet, but one of my "hobbies" includes being an Assistant H.S. football coach.  Two a days start here next Monday, and I am so stoked about the season starting I can't wait.  Anyhow, here's my nine new little amigos and amigas that made my weekend fly by.  All registered Siberians with ass kicking pedigrees.  Later.

Friday, July 26, 2013

Somebody needs an ass whoopin.

Green paint splattered all over the Lincoln Monument?  This aint some third world shit hole.  This calls for an actual ass whoopin.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

I Fucking Told You

   Yesterday, I left this comment over on the Vulgar Curmudgeon, in response to his post about the NSA lobbying the House for votes on their SuperSpyonUS program.

"I don't believe that anyone in the government has any real interest in stopping this shit. I can't belive that anyone actually has the balls to say "if you aint done nothing wrong, you got nothing to hide". Their logic is ass-backward. It is because I have done nothing wrong that the government has no right to be spying on me!"

     Well, here it is, voted down 205 to 217.

   Notice the vote against by the illustrious Speaker.

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Behind Door #3, the Junior Senator from Texas

   I just took a look at my favorite source for "news", yahoo of course.  I read the following story almost immediately after reading about how Pantsuits is destroying Choo Choo in make believe fairy dust polls.  It talks a little about why the GOP should take a look at Ted Cruz for Prez next go round.

   I know Ted aint perfect, but his flaws seem to be less ridiculously overwhelming than the other options.  In fact, from what I have seen of him, I like him.  I really like the fact that he took time out of his busy schedule to lay a verbal beatdown on Harry Reid.  I could watch this video over and over, because the laughs I get are quite simply adding years to my life.  I think Cruz needs to put stuff out like this every day.

   So, as of today, I'm backing Cruz for Prez, until Ronnie comes back from the grave.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Benghazi, NSA, IRS, F and F....oooh look, a royal baby

   The other day I read a post by a sort of friend of mine on facebook, lambasting everyone that was pissed about the Rolling Stones cover of the terroristic POS.  My friend was greatly indignant, and basically told everybody that if they didn't like it, don't buy it, but shut the fuck up already.  Then, yesterday she types out about a half page novella, congratulaing the royal couple on their new addition to the family, and in essence, oohs and aaahhs about the precious little soon to be figurehead.  Um, scuse me, but we live in Nooo Way Voh Mek-see-koh.

   What this is is simply a microcosm of exactly what is wrong with this country right now.  There are issues...serious issues, that Joe and Jane citizen could give a shit about, but the next little shiny butterfly that passes by gets their undivided attention.  Here is a person that has the balls to lecture others about being offended by something that, in her words, makes absolutely no difference in anybody's life, and yet she spends an equal or greater amount of time singing the praises of a new born babe in a country far away that is the future heir of a title that means absolutely nothing.

   I wonder how the people impacted by the Boston bombing feel about the new little princeling?

Monday, July 22, 2013

NSA replaces Rockwell. I always feel like, somebody's watchin meeeeeeeeeee.

   The more of my posts you read, the more you will come to realize exactly how much I love yahoo.  Seriously, if it weren't for yahoo, half of the stupid shit I make fun of would disappear from the interwebs.  I scour yahoo daily, because I know, deep in my heart of hearts, if I want something amazingly stoopid (with two O's), yahoo will have it.

   With that being said, I have found today's gem, although it actually led me to a cohesive thought instead of the mind numbing blather normally associated with yahoo.  I just read a story about how every day people are taking another look at exactly what they do on the internet, specifically when it comes to social media.

   I have to admit that for the longest time, I refused to have anything to do with social media, like facebook, because I was firmly convinced that the government was spying on us.  Guess I get the last laugh on that one.  After a time though, I started using facebook as a free means of advertisement for my business.   I have been, for quite some, an avid reader of conservative blogs, but I didn't leave  a lot of comments, again because of the fear of government spying.  Now here I am.

   Why the sudden change?  I have the exact opposite view as the people that I just read about.  A view that is shared, I believe, by pretty much every other blogger out there, regardless of which side of the fence they are on.  Instead of letting the government push us into hiding, we need to let them know that we will not be cowed.  Instead of being afraid that the government MIGHT spy on me because of who I friend on facebook, I will proudly stand next to the III percent, because I KNOW the government is going to spy regardless.

   In other words, you are being watched.  You are being tracked.  It doesn't make a tinkers damn if you follow the herd of sheeple or not, you are still being spied upon, and the Super Secret court just approved NSA to continue, even in the face of the enormous public outcry.  Might as well show your spine and stand against them.  If you don't now, when?

Friday, July 19, 2013


   A Denver District Court Judge has shot down (no pun intended) State Senate President John Morse' and State Senator Angela Giron's claim of an improper recall petition, opening the door for the recall elections on September 10.  Morse (Colorado Springs) and Giron (Pueblo) both supported the gun control measures that recently passed, much to the apparent chagrin of their constituents.  Both gun grabbing bottom feeders have said they will not appeal.

   Come on Coloradoanitians, you have the opportunity right in front of you to kick their sorry asses out of power and stand up for 2A.  Time to put a couple of violators of the Constitution on the unemployment line.

Thursday, July 18, 2013

WTF? Season is open already?

   Just yesterday I posted about Drone Hunting Licenses, and today I read where a drone crashed down in Flo-Ree-Duh, shutting down a stretch of highway near Tyndall AFB.  I wonder how much it costs to get one of them bad boys mounted, and how much wall space does the mount take up?

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Man I gott get one of these

The Town of Deer Trail, Colorado is considering selling "Drone Hunting Licenses", and even offering a reward to the sportsman(woman) lucky enough to bag one.

"The Town of Deer Trail shall issue a reward of $100 to any shooter who presents a valid hunting license and the following identifiable parts of an unmanned aerial vehicle whose markings and configuration are consistent with those used on any similar craft known to be owned or operated by the United States federal government."

Licenses are expected to sell like hotcakes.  I know I want one.

Better late than never, I suppose

Sometimes I sit back and wonder if I'm a little late to the game.

   I really didn't start watching what was happening in politics until just a couple of years ago, and even then I read with a fairly high degree of cautious optimism.  What I mean is, I looked at people like Breitbart as being a little over the top when it comes to Big Guvurnmint Paranoia.  Fortunately, I continued reading and researching, and stumbled my way into a lot of blogs that provided a lot of information, and I am now a believer that we are living in a country that is more like another Bourne movie than I like. 

   My point here is this;  If we are right, and the fecal matter is approaching contact with a rotary cooling device, where do I fit in?  I suffer from no illusion about physically holding my own against 20 something MMA fighters.  That aint happening.  I know I can drop a mule deer at 500 yards with a single shot without hesitation, but I aint a match for a hellfire missile or a drone strike.  Heck, I probably don't even have enough food to last more than a couple of months.  Did I wait too long to figure this out, or is there a place at the table for all?

I guess that when the time comes, that question will answer itself.  Until then, it's time to start taking care of the issues I can.

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Gotta start somewhere

   I have been standing on the sidelines long enough.  I have been posting some comments on my facebook page, but I think its time to jump in to the deeper end of the pool (besides, my facebook page was for business and my boss/wife thinks its probably a better idea not to get too political on the business site).

   I am a conservative, non-guilty white male, living in the Land of Enchantment.  I own my own business, and am a proud supporter of the 2nd Amendment.  The business that I own is a coffee shop, which is where the name of the blog, as well as my screen name come from.  I have been reading conservative blogs for quite some time now, and I have decided to throw my hat in the ring, so to speak.  On a pretty much daily basis, I read Zip, Pissed, Angel and Wirecutter just to name a few.

   This being my first post, I doubt highly that anyone will read it, but like the title says:  "You gotta start somewhere".  See you tomorrow.